R turns 6 the others turn into devils … 

So it’s R’s 6 birthday, this should be a joyous and wonderful occasion with minimal stress and lots of smiling… pffftttt who ever has convinced you of this is bullshitting. Children’s birthdays for parents are a bucket of stress, a teaspoon of parents tears, a pinch of harsh reality and A massive headache by the end of the day normally finished off with a glass of wine before 6pm. Admittedly there is some joy and pride in there but that comes after it’s all calmed down and you’ve time to think about it. 
Children don’t see this, especially mine they just see presents (normally ones they didn’t decide they wanted until the day before, so they don’t have and can make you feel guilty about for the next six months) and excitement that parents convincingly put on for the sake of the kids. 
So after frantically wrapping (with paper bought that day) and blowing up balloons the night before said birthday with Chris, as we are rather unorganised followed by a typical sleepless night. We are woken at 6.30am by a very excited R running into our room, closely followed by three other small girls and with a boy shouting at his stair gate. We paint a couple of really convincing smiles on some devastatingly exhausted faces and get the small boy child up to share the the excitement. 


We head into the lounge where R is shouting “look presents are they mine” an before we have chance to respond B replies “only if you share” .. I’ve got to admit I like her logic but also have to remind her it’s not her birthday, but she can help R by passing her presents to her. Before I’ve even finished my sentence the small boy child has run off with one of the presents. We get it back and R opens a couple of her presents and we agree the rest after everyone’s ready for school. 
So we go to get ready and A springs in us she’s got to dress as a crazy scientist! At 6.50am on the day she’s supposed to do it…. my initial thought is you’ve got to be fucking kidding me! Then all of a sudden out of my mouth slips “well you should of told us sooner, it’s tough now we don’t have time” . One of those sentences every parent wishes had stayed in thier heads. So now we have tears already, with refusal to dress and the obligatory “you’ve ruined my life” from the little ginger human, that currently has more horemones runnng around her body than blood cells. A quick message to a friend to check its true and then a google and I have a plan! I get sone felt pens and an old school shirt and make magic, in her eyes anyway and earn major mum points. (Although looking at her face in the pictures you wouldn’t think it) 


So R opens the rest of her presents and Chris heads to work. This morning met with more challenges than normal, because now there’s a bunch of new stuff in the house that can’t possibly be left. Ten minutes of battling with a now six year old that wants to take all of her presents to school, while also battling with a five year old that wants to take five balloons, a four year old that is telling everyone they can’t and pissing them off even more, a not even two year old attatched to my milk makers refusing to let go to get in the buggy, and an eight year old on repeat saying “mum am I the only one being good” over and over again. We settle on a balloon each to take and R can take one toy and I hand the boy a bag of apple fruit wigglies to distract him from feeding for long enough to at least get him in the buggy and I reassure and thank A for being so good. The walk to school I use the word walk loosely . It more resembles a stampede of children (with me muttering under my breath for god sake why won’t they just listen and walk nicely) that are all darting of in different directions or stopping to look at the crack in the pavement or in B’s case to collect snails.
 I get the three bigger ones into breakfast club and head home. I get B and the boy child their breakfast and clean up the carnage the kids have left without a care in the world (a mix of dirty clothes , toys, hair brushes and wrapping paper). We play for a while after breakfast and at 10.15am go to get R from school for her apt to collect her new glasses half hour earlier than I actually needed to. We then get a taxi from school to town where we go to gregs for a birthday treat before the apt. R and B chose cake while the poor boy was allergic to everything he dried mango pieces (as you can see below he is not impressed). The looks I got from some of the people in there for daring to give my kids cake before midday were pretty impressive to say the least. Just putting it out there, you judgmental people can think what you like they’re my children so keep your noses out! 

Now the fun starts… 
We get into specsavers (sorry to all the staff there), we sit down to wait and B finds a computer and starts playing with all the buttons . I move her away and explain we can’t do that, the boy child is moody because he’s missed his nap, but I know full well that if I take him out if his car seat there is no way in hell I will get him back in. R is making small talk with everyone encouraging them to wish her happy birthday. B goes back to the computer I must of removed her from it 6 times and by the last time inside I feel myself bubbling. I manage to scream in my head and calm myself down. Then we are called… phewww. R is trying on her glasses and B has found another play thing, a mirror and is licking it, fucking licking a mirror! I’m apologising over and over while trying to get her to listen to me (I failed at that just incase you wondered). We go to leave an she grabs loads of glasses off the shelf (this child is testing me beyond belief right now) , I put them back and calmly explain we can’t do that while in my mind screaming about how embarrassed I am and why the fuck this kid doesn’t listen to me, and march her out of the door using her full name (including middle name) and now she knows she is in trouble, so behaves for a short while we drop R back at school and go home. 
I am now battling with an over tired boy child and it takes me around 40 minutes to get him to sleep. I go down and doing the good mum thing I hand B the old iPhone and she goes to lay in my bed . I lock the door and go to join her we are both shattered and I’m looking forward to the awesome power nap we are about to have. Don’t ever look forward to anything for yourself as an adult!! 
The fucking door goes it’s the kitchen designer that I had told not to come until after 3.30 . If I wasn’t moody enough after the stress of the eye apt I certainly am now! I spend an hour entertaining then before they wake the boy child (that I had told them was in bed) up on their way out! So my mood gets worse. I get him up and paint on my best happy mum face . Then my mum walks in (thank the lord) I am now relieved I don’t have to take B And the boy child on the school run. He’s moody, I’m moody and she’s turned into some sort of possessed devil child more so than normal. 
School run time R took sweets in and is so good handed them out to all of her friends and is now handing them To all of the teachers she passes making sure she saves enough for her siblings and her two friends that are coming over one of which I collected from school with her. However the fact she has sweets has set G off as she doesn’t understand why she can’t have her packet until after dinner and why she wasn’t aloud to take any to school. She’s crying and yelling at me all the way home. While A is still reminding me of how well behaved she is being and was this morning (give her her due she has been amazing) 
We get home and R is excited to be showing her friend around the house like she’s never visited before. She opens her presents from my mum , Chris mums turns up as does R’s other friend and the kids play bar G who makes a den in my room and hides because there are too many people over.

All of a sudden I hear a scream from upstairs and A comes running down crying “mum B three loads of toys at my head” the kids on a power trip I think some days. So I bring B down and talk to her Asking her if she feels she should apologise (haha wishful thinking) instead she does the floor drop! Brilliant just what we wanted today she’s screaming and shouting rolling around the floor Luckily the kids aren’t phased and continue to play while I cuddle A and wait for B to calm down. R opens her presents from nanny. 

Then comes cake .. miraculously B stops and apologises before asking for her cake. The excitement R has when she sees cake is amazing. 

Her friends head home and we put G and B to bed closely followed by attatching the small boy to the milk makersand taking him to bed . He’s over tired so it takes forever to get him to sleep. R’s turn For bed was interesting. Bargaining with her about how many toys she could take as she can’t fit them all and herself on the bed. She settles on two after about 15 minutes of arguing with me about it. A takes herself off shortly after bless her. It’s now 8pm and I have a fruit cider and can relax until the bedtime wakings start at 9.10pn 

So yeah birthdays are fun for the kids and stress for the parents. The whirl wind of emotions is incredible . 
My babies growing up 
Look at how she grown in personality and size 
I made her the child she is today 
Where has the time gone 
I’m going to miss this 
I’ve got a headache 
Pass me the wine 
Are All things I tell myself regularly 
, Are thet worth the stress, 100 % 
Always remember the good things, positivity will get you through.

Just remember when the stress is over, sit back and think about the day picking out the most amazing bits.  It’s a lot easier To find the negatives than the positives in life And until you do you’ll live in A big bubble of stress. Cherie the stressful , joyful and tearful moments for they are the moments you won’t get back when your child is all grow up.  

I will be back tomorrow to catch up on the rest of the week. 
Hope you have a loveky evening 🙂 
Kate 😘

Author: workingbreastfeedingmumof5

I am a working , breastfeeding , mum of five. My days are interesting , stressful and hilarious.

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